Wednesday, September 14, 2011

My Brain is Hot

Last night I couldn't sleep.

Nothing new here--I'm not much of a sleeper anyway unless aided by some kind of pharmaceutical.
Mountain Man chalks it up to me making my brain hot right before I got to bed thinking about whatever random things I think about before I try to sleep.

He read a recent article about how a study of not so great sleepers wore a "cool cap"--like an ice pack for your head--that helps reduce blood flow to the brain  and aided in better, longer and more peaceful sleep.

The idea behind it was that many people lay down at night, ready to sleep, and begin thinking about questions they have about life's random details, which increases blood flow to the brain, essentially making the brain too "hot" to retreat into a good night's sleep.

But what he doesn't realize is that as I lay in that nether world between sleep and waking, just before I step over the edge, some of humankind's most trivial questions are asked and even sometimes answered.

Questions like:

*What do I need to do tomorrow?  Answer: (Everything.)

*What is the point of playing a video game where robots jump through holes in the wall?  (It's a mystery.)

*If moved all the furniture in the house, could I gain a few more square feet of livable space? (No.)

*Why does the caulking in my shower keep molding?  (Rabid mold.)

*What is 'rabid' mold? (Mold that likes the rabids left over from my sons smelly feet after he's taken a bath.)

*Will I have to demolish my existing bathroom to fix the rabid mold?  (Wait! Don't answer that.)

*At hearing a barking dog--Why is that dog barking?  (Person, squirrel, or zombie.)

*Does that dog have rabid mold? (All dogs do.)

*Is it a zombie?  (Probably.)

*If the dog bites the Zombie with his rabid mold, will the zombie get rabies? (Undoubtedly.)

*If the zombie comes in here, and tries to infect me with rabies, what would I do? (Kill it.)

*What could I use in this room to kill a zombie with?  (A high heeled shoe.)

*Would Mountain Man sleep through the zombie attack?  (Yes.)

See? This is why I can't sleep.
So now Mountain Man is convinced I need a cool cap for my hot brain.  

But first...I have a few questions.

Are you a good sleeper?  A questioner?  What keeps you up at night?


  1. Ha! Perfect post to display what a night of no-sleep feels like... I go through phases but when I am going through the no-sleep phase my mind will not stop.

  2. I'm sure people will hate me for saying this, but I fall asleep within 3 minutes of my head touching my pillow, almost every night.

  3. haha...that was a wonderful post. At first I started reading it, thinking "Yes. That is so me. I think about things and can't sleep." It comes in stages. A long bout of insomnia and then I'm good again. And then...

    Anyway, then I read on about the study and thought, "How cool? (no pun intended...or is it? even I don't even know. Subconsciously?) But a cold pack. Brrrrrrr!

    And then I kept reading and the edges of my mouth began to curve upward and soon I was thinking "Wow...this is definitely not me. This lady is nuts. I love her." :-) Of course, my train of thought when writing or hanging with friends is similar, so I guess we are all a little nuts. As my friend says, "Of course we're nuts. We're writers!!"

    And to MATTHEW...yes, we hate you. (just kidding)

  4. Linda! You crack me up!
    Melissa, I go through the phrase thing too...sigh. I hate not sleeping.
    And yes, Matthew, I hate you for that thing only...however, I think it's just a sign of your clean conscience and pure soul. :)

  5. Matthew is a lucky lucky man.

    My head sounds EXACTLY like yours whilst I attempt sleep. Even the part about zombies and dogs and rabid stuff...

    Sleep forever eludes me. It's MADDENING! Then I'm a grump in the morning. I need a cool cap desperately.

  6. Crystal, maybe we could get a two for one!!