Ah, kryptontie, you shifty, shifty element from the planet where Superman was born. You were his one weakness, well that--and wearing his underwear over his clothes...but I digress. Kryptonite was Superman's downfall at times, his one weakness that rendered him powerless, frail and human.
Knowing the signs of what causes you to lose your power and go completely weak at the knees is important so you can be safe, dash from the trouble, flee to your crystal/ice love shack in the Canadian wilderness and talk to your long dead father (who mysteriously looks like the Godfather) about the mysteries of chemistry, world history and what kind of underwear you should wear over your leotard while fighting crime.
My own Kryptonite is so varied that I can't possibly list them all here without running out of clean outer underwear before I got to the end of the list, but my primary Kryptonite is...wait for it.....I fall down....a lot. No, seriously, I resemble a female, and much younger, Gerald Ford.
Sidewalks, paths, roads, steps, and cracks are my Kryptonite. Gravity is out to get me. I fall down at least once a day. Before you think that I may have an inner ear problem, let me assure you, I don't. Once, quite recently, I tripped over a stray piece of gravel and landed face down in a parking lot. It would have been fine if there hadn't been a group of people nearby watching the entire graceless act take place.
I've fallen up stairs, down stairs, sideways on the stairs, out of trees, off of horses, and getting ONto horses (don't ask.) Just about anywhere where humankind can be upright, I've fallen down.
In fact, just this very morning, I was walking into my own backyard and the sidewalk leaped up and tried to kill me. I was launched forward into our fence and would have surely taken out an eye had not the fence stopped my descent to the ground. I ended up with two palms full of slivers and some bruised pride...again, but at least I didn't hit the ground. And the worst part? I can't even run away to my Canadian Ice Chalet lair because I would just fall down trying to get there.
I need a plastic anti-gravity bubble to protect me, because unlike Superman, who's Kryptonite can be hidden away in a lead box, my Kryptonite is around me ALL of the time. Every time I stand up the potential for falling down increases. Yesterday, I had to make my way down 3 flights of steep and slippery marble stairs several times carrying heavy boxes of art supplies. With each step I would mutter, "Bent knees, do not fall. Bent knees, do not fall."
I was actually tempted to go all toddler and sit on my butt and slide down, which would have been safer, but I was in a public building and just couldn't bring myself to do it.
Next time, maybe.
What's your Kryptonite?