Monday, April 16, 2012

Know the Signs: Nefariousness

Ok, so here we are half way through the A to Z challenge and we've learned some things along the way.  We've learned that only 2 people can carry off a moustache (Tom Selleck and Michael P--whom I forgot to include in Saturday's post--he looks like a more handsome and smarter version of Tom, so he's in.)

We've also learned that most people are fabulous.  Good driving is more about what you don't do rather than what you do do, and that I fall down frequently.  We've also learned that I talk to a lot of crazy people, and I can't understand a thing my mom says.  So today, I thought it only appropriate to point out the signs of nefariousness.

Knowing the signs of nefariousness is critical so that if a tall, thin man approaches you while wearing a top hat and twirling his moustache (which we call know that unless you are Mr. Selleck, or Michael P, people won't take you seriously, so just don't) and laughing despotically (yes, that's an adjective, as in, "He laughed despotically before he pushed the button to obliterate all human life as we know it.") "Muahahaha!!" then you better run for your life, 'cause he is out to get you.  

Other signs of nefarious behavior include,
A) ranting monologues while sober
B) trying to fit people with a pair of cement galoshes
C) being bald while speaking in a ridiculous British accent demanding "One MILLION dollars!!!", or
D) frequently trying to choke people with corrupted Jedi mind powers while heavy breathing.

Seemingly ridiculous, recognizing nefariousness is actually one of the most important things you can do if you find yourself being beguiled by that top hatted thin man.  If you listen to his insane laughter for too long you may decide to accept a position with organized crime, have the urge to rant while sober (which frequently happens to me, by the way) demand "One MILLION dollars!!" from the dude at the car wash for no reason, or try to mind choke the IRS guy who just threatened to audit you--and self awareness is the first step to avoid becoming a super villain.  In the words of G.I. Joe, "Knowing is half the battle."

So, embrace your self awareness, know the signs, and avoid being a super villain.

Who's your favorite nefarious villain?

21 comments:

  1. trekking your blog!!! first time to hear the word.. thanks for the info! hehe

    cheers!
    ..TREK..

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  2. Nefarious villain? L. Malfoy (the father with the white hair) and Doug Ray Scott in "Mission:Impossible".

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    Replies
    1. Both evil bad dudes for SURE!! And Lucious Malfoy really should have known better...

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  3. Knowing IS half the battle! So true. Joe was a wise man. :)

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    Replies
    1. Joe rocked. We had the GI joe action figure growing up that was like a cool Ken-barbie doll. He had a camper and everything!

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  4. You're too funny! And so is this post!! I actually used the word nefarious in my novel while describing the Mafia.

    Anyway, I'm a new follower via the A to Z. Nice to meet you, STG!

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    Replies
    1. Nice to meet YOU, Nancy!! Nefarious IS the nest way to describe the mafia...great minds and all that!

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  5. I don't think I use the word 'nefarious' all that much when I think of that word, I always think of all those Disney movies villans for some reason. maybe it's because they are so obvious.

    I have fun reading your A-Z posts. hope you have a sweet spring.

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    Replies
    1. I think I just need to use the word nefarious more often. It is under utilized for sure.
      I hope you are having a sweet spring too!!

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  6. Nefarious is a word I constantly use to describe my ten year old, matriarchal homicidal child...Spawn is another.

    Absolutely brilliant posts! I'm definitely following.

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    Replies
    1. Sounds like momma talk--after all, who amongst us HASN'T referred to our children as nefarious??

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  7. I am so glad I didn't have to google the word since I knew you were going to explain it all for me! I am thinking Dick Dastardly and Muttley!

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  8. I enjoy a good sober rant... but I'm not bald, and my English accent is pretty decent. I think I'm on the fence!

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    Replies
    1. Sober ranting is the best kind of rant...welcome to the club!:)

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  9. Hey, nice to meet you. Love this word.

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