First off, let me say, this month has been a pure joy. I've read some incredibly wonderful blogs, met some new blogging buddies, and feel more connected with the world at large and people who love to write, read, create and find joy through their observations. CHEERS TO US!!! Gratitude to our fabulous A to Z hosts too!!
Now, let's get to it.
Without a doubt, knowing the signs of a zombie attack will save your life. If you don't know the signs you will find yourself half eaten, dead and really gross looking. This is why this is the most important post of the Know the Signs series this month.
The signs of a Zombie Attack include:
- While rousing your teenager from bed, you look down to find that they've left their foot behind.
- While looking at a small child, you see that when they sneeze, brains come out instead of boogers.
- On your morning walk, you notice that your town is eerily quiet.
- Instead of saying the "Pledge of the Allegiance" the 3rd graders to whom you are going to teach art chant, "Brrrraaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnsssssss!"
- While standing in line at the bank, you notice that all the tellers are taking deposits in the form of fingers, toes, eyes, ears, mouths, and noses.
- While in bed, you notice that your husband/partner's flesh has become green with rot and possesses an unholy smell....or maybe he just needs to shower.
- The agoraphobic neighbor you've never seen before has now left his house and is trying to claw his way into yours.
- While watching the nightly news, you notice that while the anchorman was using his hands for emphasis, one fell off and bounced away.
- While brushing your own teeth, your nose mysteriously drops off into the sink...and you really don't care.
Zombie Attacks are real, friends.
The last recorded one was during Watergate--think about it--Richard Nixon: zombie.
You can see, we are long overdue.
So, know the signs, buy a machete, run away.
How do you plan on surviving the zombie apocalypse of 2012?