Sunday, July 22, 2012

How Much Should a Blogger Reveal?


I had a conversation the other day with a blogging buddy of mine (my blind date) that didn't last too long because we quickly moved onto other topics since we were in full getting-to-know-you-mode.

Our brief conversation was about honesty.  How much do we as bloggers reveal to the audience at large, knowing that on some level someone who reads your blog will probably unfriend you on Facebook (no big deal) or confront you in the produce aisle at the local grocery store (terrifying, especially if you're with your kids) about something you wrote.

I censor myself more rigorously than a 1950's banned books committee.  Don't get me wrong--my feelings about the guy who digs through my trash is a pillar of emotional and literary honesty.   My feelings about people being fabulous was honest as well.  However, I often don't write about the social issues that I believe in, trouble me, and would like to see change.

Part of that is because there are others more eloquent than I who express their ideas with such passion that I don't really see the need.  And at the same time...part of me would like to stand on the rooftop and declare my political and social beliefs that would get me shamed right out of my small town Mormon culture.  I can't go a day without being invited to a "Mormons for Mitt" BBQ.  It was kind of funny when I declined the Facebook invite with the phrase, "I'm a Democrat and a vegetarian...can I still come?"

Hm.  I haven't heard back from them yet.     


What about you?  Do you find yourself censoring what you blog about?  Why?  



15 comments:

  1. Believe it or not I do censor myself. Some of the things I most want to write about I can't, for fear of losing my job or being sued or hurting someone's feelings. That being said, I don't censor anything else. I started my blog as a personal journal and I try to keep it that way. If I feel passioate about religion or politics, I write about it, but I rarely feel passionate about either topic.
    Whatever comes down on the page, for me, has to be honest. Honesty is the most important thing. It's why I love your blog, Lisa (plus you're so darned funny). You may not write about everything in your head, but what shows up on your blog I believe is who you really are - and that's all the honesty anyone needs.

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    1. Awwww....thanks Cathy. It's been one of those weeks...;)

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  2. I think Cathy makes some great points. I have reached a stage and place in my life where speaking my mind (in relation to myself) is both liberating and therapeutic. I feel comfortable in doing this as I feel I know myself better than anyone else and I would be able to defend any challenges or queries which may come my way in relation to this topic. However.....I am very conscious of the ramifications of 'speaking out' about issues which I still only have my perspective to go on - and yet know that my views may be skewed and biased because of so many factors. The thought of unintentionally offending/hurting someone else is a price I'm not willing to pay. Therefore, I would rather not write anything about a particulat topic or issue if I feel I am not being totally honest and transparent with my dealings with the subject matter. I really respect those individuals who have the strength of character and capacity to explore and promote discussion in relation to contentious issues - as long as it is done in a respectful manner.

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    1. I TOTALLY agree with you! And I think that's one of the reasons that I don't write about certain topics--even if I want to. "It's better to be kind, than right." :)

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  3. yes, I sensor myself often, I think some opinions have been express too often and I rather talk about sweet, nice things than to bring up topics that can lean to arguments and rude comments. but I'm willing to share my views if asked.

    besides, isn't the old saying kind of applies to blogging? -- "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." although it doesn't apply to complaining about your day.

    hope you have a sweet day.

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    1. It's amazing how "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" is still good advice!! :)xoxo

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  4. I think I'm a slightly different person online than I am in real life - it's not intentional, not really, although if I'm in a bad mood, you're not likely to find out, I'll always appear much happier than I feel. My opinions are always genuine, but I will censor my more extreme views - had bad experience, and don't want to repeat it :-)

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    1. I hear ya, Annalisa! I think that's part of the joy of blogging, is that it's like "real life" but not too...

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  5. I try not to make my blog known to everybody in my social circles, but I don't write about things too personal if I know it would cause any ill feelings. It's not worth the trouble. I can always write about it in my personal journal if I really need to get something off my chest.

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  6. "shamed right out of my small town Mormon culture"??? My dear Lisa, I have heard you speak of your love for the Savior and, more importantly, I have felt your love. Thankfully, we are not all cookie cutter little people, whether Mormon or not. And how awesome it is that we all have differing views on things - yahoo!! And if anybody ever tried to shame you out of your small town Mormon culture . . . then shame on them.

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  7. Lisa Stott, I may not always agree with you on political views, but I'd never shame you out of anywhere! You're an amazing person and I value your thoughts and words. As for me, yes I find myself censoring my blogging when it comes to any details about family members and not sure I'd want everyone knowing my intimate thoughts of craziness at times! :) And I'd never want to hurt anyone, intentional or otherwise. I agree with everything that's been said before me.

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  8. I sensor myself with certain aspects of what I talk about. I don't talk about politics anymore after getting some really horrible, angry comments. And I don't talk a lot about specifics with my job or my family or my love life. Just too personal to share out there.

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  9. Tricky question that needs to be constantly asked. On my blog I write about the Civil War, the Old West, horror fiction, and writing in general. My feelings on religion, politics, etc. would be off topic so I don't talk about them. If somebody asks, then I tell them. If they don't like my opinions that's there problem!

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