Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Beautifully Imperfect

I am a firm believer in swearing.

As a somewhat unorthodox Mormon woman, I can fully and wholeheartedly admit without shame or guilt that I was raised by at least one pirate and one of the things that he passed onto me was an ability to let loose when occasion arises.

I am not afraid to admit this, because I am truly, utterly and hopelessly flawed, but I'm stitched together with good intentions. And to be honest, sometimes, there's just no other word.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not about gratuitous swearing, or cussing just to say words "you shouldn't say" but every once in a while, like when you drop something on your foot, or fall off a horse, or get fired, or the zombies start their attack, a nice, juicy, ripe swear word seems appropriate.

I know that there will be many of you who COMPLETELY disagree.You may think that I'm a "bad example", "rude", "crass"--whatever, and that's o.k--because one of the other gifts my goodly parents gave me was to not really give a flying fart in space what other people think of me. Because it takes all kinds to make this world we live in a joyous complexity of crazy, which is just another phrase for, "being human."

Take my father-in-law, for example: Just a few nights ago he told me that anyone who works on commission is a "whore of the earth".

My own dad worked on commission his whole damn life. But I didn't mind a bit when my father-in-law said that, because I say CRAZY stuff ALL the time.

Take last week for instance:
It has been recently brought to my attention that Mountain Man doesn't like soup.

I know.
What a freak.
Who doesn't like soup???

After 15 years of marriage and countless soups, NOW he tells me.
Instead of saying, "Oh, that's o.k. we won't eat soup anymore" I said, "If you don't like soup, then you don't like fall. And if you don't like fall, then you don't like winter. If you don't like winter, then you CLEARLY hate Santa, and if you hate Santa, then you hate the Easter Bunny, and if you hate the Easter Bunny then you don't like Jesus."

Really. That's the kind of crazy I spew out.

So Pops, don't call me--I'm not offended in the least (and I just wrote the word "damn" on my blog and pointed out to your son that not liking soup apparently has serious spiritual ramifications.) I also just threw you under the bus on an open blogging forum...I should probably call you to apologize, but your grandson ran down the battery on my phone playing Angry Birds...so don't wait up. Also, there may be a seed of truth in that phrase...and I can say that because I work on commission too.

I also judge people, yell at stupid drivers, and write mean emails that I never send. I also JUST flipped my husband off. Our daughter was in the other room and I could hear her laughing. Mountain Man said "She just flipped me off so loud you could hear it, huh?"

Now don't get me wrong: I believe in doing my best--I really do. And sometimes my "best" is that I didn't lift my fist to someone's face. So if dropping a couple choice words takes the place of throwing an anvil at someone, then I choose the lesser offense.

I've never been one to paste on a smile and pretend that everything's o.k.

To put it simply: I am what I am, wherever I am.

I am like a rough stone in a river, getting tossed and turned by the rapids. As I get thrown about in this life from time to time I scream out, "This @!#&*@ hurts like hell!!"

I am beautifully imperfect.


a beautifully imperfect day...


How are you beautifully imperfect?

27 comments:

  1. You sure are! Don't ever Change



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  2. I absolutely love this! If only everyone could admit how "beautifully imperfect" they are. I know I am!! :)

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  3. ........separated at birth!!!! Oh and Michael was just messing with me and received his own bird
    Lol

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  4. Hahaha! That's why we love each other. We both write nasty emails. I accidentally sent one to Hunter's principal...okay...I toned it down some. I love loud crazy punk rock music and bars and tattoos and twisted movies and not being a grown up. We just had conf. Time for a phone call!! ;) squishy smoochies

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    1. Squishy Smoochies right backatcha babycakes!

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  5. I love swearing! It's so expressive! My favourite is bloody buggery bollocks, I dare you to say it and no smile!

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    1. Ok, Kellie, I WISH WISH WISH with my whole heart that "bloody buggery bollocks" were swear words in the States. I need some new ones....:D

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    2. But it is really fun to say!!! ;)

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  6. Love this! - "Now don't get me wrong: I believe in doing my best--I really do. And sometimes my "best" is that I didn't lift my fist to someone's face."

    There's a quote I read a very long time ago and I say it to myself when I start to worry about other people's opinions and wonder why they don't like me or don't respect what I do, etc.. It goes something like this - "What other people think of me is none of my business." It helps. :)

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    1. O my goodness, Madeline! I chant that quote ALL the time!!! It totally helps! :)

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  7. I'm like that too except I know very little curse words. I think it's better to let your words out, however colorful, than to keep it inside and explode later which is bad for you emotionally.

    I think everyone's perfectly imperfect in their own ways, it's only human

    hope you have a great day.

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    1. Amen, Lissa! Here's to our imperfections! *clink*

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  8. I don't like soup. I do enjoy colorful language with a dash of salt, however. :-)

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    1. Hahaha! You and Mountain Man would get along just fine...:) And of course, you and I already do! ;)

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  9. Oh my goodness...I love this, Lisa!!! Yes, a good swear word in a bad situation can definitely see me through to the other side.

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  10. People without flaws make me nervous, self-conscious and generally uncomfortable! Much love to you! Argh!

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  11. what was the context of my little brother's remark - surely he knows that most people work on commission - was he mad at one imperfect sector of the human race? sometimes i think you and i are the same person expressing in different bodies- sure love you with all your supposed imperfections - i think they are just beautiful individual expression of the divine - swear for me today!!!!!

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  12. I love it! I have to admit that I really only say a few words if I'm really, really angry, but every once in a while something will slip out of my mouth that makes me wonder, "where the heck did that come from?" I must watch too much television! :) (that's it; I'll blame it on tv!) Commission is a great thing! :)

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    1. Lol! Commission IS a great thing! ;)

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